I heart Boracay
A week in Boracay, Philippines
Now this was a dream come true! We were on a beautiful island in the South China Sea, the 4 km long white beach (aptly named White Beach) stretching before me, traditional double-outrigger wooden boats dotted across the turquoise waters, the Oldies, quiet for once, sitting at a beach bar under the shade of the palm trees, sipping their beers and nibbling freshly baked Bavarian pretzels. Wait a minute. What?
Only in the Philippines! Apparently the original owner of this beach bar had a strong German connection and to this day, fresh Brezen are baked there every Wednesday. And believe me they tasted as good as the ones I had managed to peck at in Munich when Her Ladyship wasn’t looking.
Well, apart from this random German influence, Boracay was the quintessential vision I’d had of the Philippines. We had flown down from Manila for a week’s stay and I felt like a bird in paradise.
Our first outing ticked all the boxes – a day’s island hopping, visiting more beautiful beaches, small islands, sea caves, swimming off the boat (don’t tell her I told you, but Herself chickened out of the swimming!), tucking into a delicious and beautifully presented Boodle Fight for lunch… a perfect day on an island paradise!
Naturally enough, this beautiful island attracts tourists en masse. All along the beach front and inland, the shops were heaving with people, and selfie-mania was the order of the day. I suppose that’s not everyone’s cup of tea. My cuppa was the fantastic choice of restaurants. My favourite by far was one with a shop out front where you first chose and paid for your seafood. The raw fish was then handed over to the restaurant staff who discussed with you how you wanted it cooked, the cooking being charged at so much per kilo. Proper order!
This trip had me walking on air. Almost literally in fact, as we took an island tour by helicopter. Those stunning bird’s-eye views of Boracay will stay with me for a long time to come.
I was only too happy to accompany the Oldies as they explored the island overland, or on their many walks along beautiful White Beach, staying in the shade of the coconut palms wherever possible. It was a toss up between melting in the hot sun or risking getting brained by a falling coconut. The nuts won.
On the opposite side of the island, the windy side, we sat for hours on Bulabog Beach, watching kite surfers in full flight. And, believe it or not, the Wingless Wonders took flight themselves. They went parasailing! I was astounded that Her Ladyship, who is practically allergic to water, had agreed to the venture as it involved getting dunked into the sea before being winched back on board. Pigs will be flying next!
The week came to an end all too quickly and before I knew it we were on the boat to the mainland to catch our flight back to Manila. So much for Her Ladyship’s new-found sea legs – she made a complete show of herself by getting violently sick. I was mortified. As we disembarked, instead of keeping well clear of her – and who would blame them? – many of our fellow passengers made a point of coming over to offer help or simply to wish her a speedy recovery.
Later, as Her Ladyship staggered through airport security, one guard shouted over to her: ‘I love your hair, Ma’am!’ Colour returned to her cheeks and she perked up no end. Then followed two little words which made her instantly turn green again: ‘Rod Stewart!’
‘I don’t believe it!’ I heard her mutter. ‘Himself is constantly being told that he looks like Sean Connery, but my Doppelgänger is an ancient, male rock star!’ Oh yes, she was sick again. Pig sick. And I was sick laughing.
A few days later, in a café in Manila, one of the party spotted definitive proof that that airport security guard had had a point. Even Her Ladyship could no longer deny it.
